I had my Weight Watchers meeting today.  I wasn’t able to attend a meeting last week, because I was too busy with Thanksgiving week activities.  Even though I was bad over Thanksgiving weekend, I still managed to lose 1.6 pounds over the last two weeks, so I’m now down a total of 35.0 pounds.  That means I’ve hit another 5 pound increment, but once again, I’m not in much of a celebratory mood.  Sometimes, my pain level seems to be worse than it was six months ago.  Maybe it’s partially psychological, but the pain’s really been getting to me lately.

This afternoon at work, I actually broke down in tears a couple of times because I’m getting so sick of having almost every body movement I make causing pain somewhere.  Fortunately, no one happened to walk by my cubicle the two times it happened.  That would have been embarassing.

Co-worker: “Oh, my God, Paul, did someone die?”

Me: “No, I’m just too much of a wimp to tolerate the pain.”

Sometimes, I wish I could take narcotics, but I can’t because of my sleep apnea.  The over-the-counter stuff is close to being useless.  I know I’m not perfect, but I am trying, and I am losing some weight.  I just wish I could have even a tiny little reduction in the pain level.  I feel like it’s getting to the point where it’s goint to start actually altering my personality.  Or maybe it already has and I just don’t realize it.  So, I’m hoping for a reduction in the pain level soon.  In the mean time, I just have to stick to the plan, and keep losing as much as I can.

On a brighter note, my favorite Christmas special was on TV tonight.  Maybe this is embarassing for an almost 46-year-old man to admit, but my favorite Christmas special is Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and it was on tonight.  I watch it every year.  I don’t care whether I miss any of the other specials, but I always try and catch Rudolph.  The thing is, I’m kind of a “Bah, Humbug” when it comes to Christmas.  Rudolph is the only thing that gets me close to being in the spirit of the season.  If you celebrate Christmas, hopefully there’s something that gets you into the spirit.

I can’t believe it’s almost December.  Time really does seem to fly!  I don’t really have much to report on the weight-loss front.  I’m a Weight Watchers at Work member, which means our meetings are held in a conference room at the office during lunch hour.  But last week, I was in an off-site training class, and I never got to the meetign, and I never got to a center meeting, so I had no weigh-in last week.  Next weigh-in is this Wednesday.

I was 33.4 pounds down as of my last weigh-in, so I did buy myself a 5-pound reward.  I got an e-book for my Kindle, True Blue by David Baldacci.  I know that the first two books I’ve bought were both by Baldacci, so the next one I buy will be by another author.  So far, True Blue is very good, and I recommend it, although I haven’t finished it yet.

A funny thing happened to me about a week-and-a-half ago, although it wasn’t funny at the time.  I was up at my father’s house, and I went to pick my one brother up from work.  When we got home, I tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and fell.  My weight, combined with my joint pain, meant that I just couldn’t get back up on my own.  So, my brother went across the street to get one of the neighbors.  Between the two of them, they still couldn’t get me up.  So, then my brother called 911.  When the cop got there, he and the neighbor together were able to get me up on my feet.  My only injury was a skinned knee.  It was pretty embarrasing, though.  I also think there must not have been many calls for the police that night, because after they got me back on my feet, another cop arrived, and then another, and then another, so there were four cruiser cars in front of my father’s house!!  All because one big fat guy fell on his butt!!  Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!!!  Anyway, I’ve been much more careful and paranoid about my walking since that happened, especially if it’s after dark.

That’s all for tonight – I hope everyone’s well out there.

I was good on the eating plan this week, with the exception of the Saturday night pizza, which wasn’t really even that good.  In spite of that, I had a very good loss this week.  I’ve now lost a total of 33.4 pounds since joining WW.  This Friday will be my 6-month anniversary of starting on Weight Watchers, so I guess 30-some pounds in 6 months isn’t too bad.

That being said, I’m still experiencing a lot of joint pain.  Most of it stems from my lower back.  I have spondylolysis, which is a genetic defect in the back.  I have sciatica-like symptoms from that, causing pain to shoot down mostly my right side.  Then, I have some hip, knee, and, occasionally, ankle pain as well.  I guess I’m going to have to lose a lot more weight before I experience any real relief from the pain.

Last week, I ordered and received my Amazon Kindle, which is my reward to myself for passing the first 25 pounds lost hurdle.  I bought one book to start with, First Family by David Baldacci.  I know the New York Times Book Review has savaged Baldacci, but he writes a good thriller.  If you’ve ever seen the movie Absolute Power with Clint Eastwood and Gene Hackman, that was based on a Baldacci book.

I said that I was going to get a smaller reward for every 5 pounds lost.  Now that I’ve passed over the 30 pound barrier, I’m going to buy another book for the Kindle.  I haven’t decided yet what I’m going to order, though.  I’ll let you know in my next post.

I have finally passed over the 25 pounds lost threshold after joining Weight Watchers in May!  I hope the next 25 pounds won’t take as long.  Maybe three months instead of six.

As per my post last week, I’ve decided to start rewarding myself for every 25 pounds lost.  If you read the list, the rewards are rather lavish (bribes??), but, I figure it has to be something I really, really want in order to stay motivated.

Tonight, I ordered my first reward, for 25 pounds lost.  It’s an Amazon Kindle.  I should receive it in 3 – 5 business days.  I really like the idea of not having so much book clutter around, and I like reading, so I’m really looking forward to getting the Kindle.

I didn’t realize when I decided on the reward system that I was so close to achieving the 25 pound goal.  I thought it would be a few more weeks, because I had missed some Weight Watchers meetings, and hadn’t weighed in in almost a month.

I’m thinking of letting myself have smaller rewards for every 5 pounds lost.  For example, maybe for 30 pounds, I could buy some content for the Kindle.  Of course, I know that as soon as I get it, I’m going to want to get a book right away to try it out, but for future reference, maybe a small reward for each 5 pounds lost, and then larger rewards for each 25 pounds lost.  This new reward system is still a work in progress, so bear with me.

My next Weight Watchers meeting is on Wednesday, so I’ll see if I’ve lost any more!!

THE PHILLIES

If you’ve read this blog before, then you know that I’m a life-long fan of the Philadelphia Phillies, and, if you follow baseball, then you know that the NY Yankees defeated the Phillies in the World Series last week, 4 games to 2.  If truth be told, the Yankees played very good baseball, and the Phillies did not.  If the Phillies had played their best, the Yankees may still have won, but it would have been closer than it was.  It probably would have gone 7 full games.  I’d like to think the Phillies would have won if they had played their best, but I guess I’m biased.  2010, here we come!!

Forgive me, but this post is going to be longer than normal.  First of all, I haven’t posted in a while, and second of all, I have quite a bit on my mind.  So, I will do this by categories, starting with the most important one, my health and weight.

HEALTH AND WEIGHT

I know I’ve posted about this before, but sometimes I think that, somewhere deep in my subconscious mind, I must enjoy living in misery.  I say this, because I absolutely know and understand what I need to do to lose weight.  I know what foods are good for me, and what foods are bad.  I know what foods have too much fat in them.  I know which cuts of meat are the fattiest.  I know which are the leanest.  When I eat something that’s really fattening, it is not out of ignorance.  I know when I’m eating it that it has too much fat and too many calories, but sometimes I eat it anyway.

I know that if I stick to a prescribed plan, I can lose weight.  I’ve been going to Weight Watchers meetings since May, and the weeks that I’ve stuck to the plan, I’ve lost weight.  The weeks I haven’t stuck to the plan, I haven’t lost weight.  DUH!!!!  My problem with Weight Watchers has been the same problem I’ve had with every diet and weight loss plan I’ve ever been on.  I never stick to it over an extended period of time.  Ever.

So, where does that leave me?  Well, one thing I could do is to go through with gastric bypass surgery.  I went through all the prep for the surgery during 2008, and then I wimped out on getting the actual surgery.  I’ve been thinking about that quite a bit lately.  If I had gone through with it, I’d probably be a good 150 pounds lighter at this point.  Instead, I’m almost as fat as ever.  I still don’t like the idea of having my innards rerouted, and I don’t like the idea of a lap band, either.  I have Barrett’s Esophagus, and the surgeon told me that sometimes the symptoms of Battett’s can get worse with a lap band, but not with the Roux-n-Y bypass procedure.  Mostly, though, I still don’t like the idea of getting the surgery.  But, if things don’t improve soon, I may not have any choice.

My back pain and joint pain has been worse this year than it ever has been in the past.  I went through 2 1/2 months of physical therapy, and I have to question whether it has helped.  I’m still in almost constant pain.  Tylenol, Advil, and Aleeve provide little relief; I’ve tried them all.  I can’t take narcotic pain meds because they mess with your repiration, and I have obstructive sleep apnea.  Back in 2006, I lost some weight, and then put it all back on.  Back in 2007, I lost some weight, and then put it all back on.  Back in 2009, I lost some weight, and then put it all back on.  Each time, I lost between 30 and 40 pounds (not nearly enough, since I weigh over 400 pounds).  Every time I’ve gained the weight back, it’s gotten more painful to move around.  Last year, when I lost weight, I had gotten to the point where I could walk for about a 1/2 hour at a time.  Right now, I can barely walk for 5 minutes.

So, where does that leave me?  Since I’m not going to go through with any surgery (at least not right now), and I’m going to continue to attend Weight Watchers meetings, I’ve decided to try something new – well, new for me.  I’ve seen this idea on other blogs, and also read about it in various publications.  It’s rewarding oneself for reaching certain weight loss goals.  Actually, I call it self-bribery, but I’m going to try it and see if it works.  If it doesn’t, then I may be going back for a surgical consult.

I’ve decided to reward myself for every 25 pounds lost.  Since I have a lot to lose, that seems like a good increment.  My rewards are going to be lavish – I’m hoping that this will help with my motivation.  I’m single and don’t have any kids, and I have a decent, secure job (at least for now), so I can afford the rewards.  But, I hardly ever reward myself for anything, except of course with the continuing misery of carrying all this extra weight around.

I’m going to use my starting weight with Weight Watchers back in May as my starting point.  I haven’t decided on the exact order of my rewards yet, except for the first one.  For 25 pounds lost, I’m getting an Amazon Kindle Reader.  I really want one of those things, and I really need to get over that first hurdle.  For subsequent rewards, I haven’t decided on the order yet, but here’s my reward list -

• New PC (with widescreen monitor)
• GPS Nav unit for my car
• HDTV (I still have an old-fashioned TV)
• Laptop computer

That’s my reward list so far.  Along with the Kindle Reader, that will take me up to 125 pounds lost (which would still leave my with quite a ways to go, but it would be a good start).

So, there’s my new plan.  I really hope this works, because I really don’t want to have my innards rerouted.

A RANT ABOUT COMCAST CABLE

I’ve been a Comcast Cable customer for quite a while, and I’ve had some customer service issues with them in the past, but this past weekend, it was finally the straw that broke the camel’s back.

On Saturday around noon, my cable went out, both TV and Internet.  I waited for about an hour, and it didn’t come back on.  So, I called Comcast.  They took my information, and said they’d see what they could do.  About three hours later, the cable was still out, so I called again.  I told them it still wasn’t working, and asked when someone was coming out to take a look.  The rep told me that their procedure is to set up an appointment unless there was an area-wide outage.  Since my area didn’t have an outage, they had set me up an appointment for Monday between 11 and 1.  This was all stuff that the first rep hadn’t told me.  So, I had an appointment that the first rep didn’t tell me about, and it was for two days later!  I tried to argue and press my point, but to no avail, and I finally hung up.  At that point, I decided that Comcast was going to lose my business.

I checked the cable periodically on Sunday, just to see if it had miraculously started working again.  It hadn’t.  So, Monday came, and I knew I was going to be too busy at work to leave in the middle of the day, so I called and rescheduled the appointment for late this afternoon.  Then, I called Verizon, got a price quote for FIOS service, and set up an appointment for next Monday to have it installed.

Today, the Comcast tech actually got here right at the beginning of the 2-hour window, which I think is the first time that ever happened, but it was already too late to impress me.  He checked the line, both inside and outside, and here’s what happened.  The line going into my apartment was on a splitter with the line going into another apartment in my building (why they do that, I have no idea!!).  The other line on the splitter with mine got disconnected on Saturday, so mine got disconnected, too!  It took about 5 minutes to fix it.  Now, I know Comcast has techs working on weekends.  I saw two trucks drive by here.  I even tried (unsuccessfully) to flag one down.  But, they couldn’t be bothered, because of their “procedures”, so now they’re losing a customer.  Bottom line – my guaranteed-for-two-years monthly cost for FIOS is going to be about $40 less than I’m currently shelling out to Comcast, and I’m going to get more TV channels, more music channels, and faster Internet speed.  So, in the end it will turn out alright; Comcast just lost a customer is all.

THE WORLD SERIES

If you have read this blog before, you probably know that I’m a lifelong Philadelphia Phillies fan.  They won the World Series last year, and have gone back to the Series again this year, but they’re not having a great time of it.  After winning the first game of the Series against the New York Yankees, they proceeded to lose three games in a row.  Bottom line – the Yankees played well, the Phillies didn’t.  Last night, they managed to pull one out to keep from losing the Series, but they’re still down 3 games to 2, with (hopefully) 2 games to go in New York.  I’m remaining hopeful, but their backs are really up against the wall.

Like I said at the top of this post, this would be a longer post than normal.  Sorry about that.

Things haven’t gone well the last week.  I haven’t been doing a good job of tracking my food intake, and I know I’m taking in way too much fat content.  I would be afraid to weigh in at my Weight Watchers meeting tomorrow, except that I got an e-mail this afternoon saying that the meeting was cancelled for this week.  I go to an at work session, and there’s a walk tomorrow that everyone’s going on.  Well, everyone except for me, that is, because I would barely make it one block, and I think the walk is over a mile.  In any case, it’s too far for me to walk.

I have to keep in the habit of tracking my food every day.  I’m not sure why it’s been harder the last week or so.  I could say it’s because I’ve been swamped at work (I have been) and a little stressed out, and a little burned out, but those are just excuses.  I mean, how long does it really take to write something down.  Even if you work 80 hours a week, you have time to do that!

On another subject, my father is going back to his house this weekend after three months in assisted living.  I hope he’ll do alright at the house.  Both of my brothers will be living there, also, but they both work.  We’re going to arrange for some volunteers from his church, along with some help from an elder care service, and, hopefully, between the two, he’ll have enough help.

Finally tonight, the Phillies have advanced to the next level of the playoffs!  They’ll be meeting the Dodgers in the NLCS.  Go Phillies!!

Happy October!  I can’t believe it’s autumn already, but here we are!  How time flies.  They say we’re going to have a colder than usual winter here in the Mid-Atlantic region of the US.  Personally, I hope they’re wrong.

On the weight loss front, I’ve been having some good days and some bad days lately.  Weekends continue to be the biggest problem.  However, I did lose 1.4 pounds at my Weight Watchers® weigh-in last Wednesday.  Since this weekend was probably worse than the previous weekend, I’ll be hoping to break even for this week’s weigh-in.

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, then you know that my father has been in an assisted living facility for the last three months.  He has been doing a lot better, and will be going back to his home in two weeks.  He’s still going to need assistance, and his driving days are definitely behind him, but we’re going to see how he can manage at the house for a while.  Both of my brothers will be living there with him, so he won’t be all alone.

I got into a debate with one of my lunch buddies at work today over the correct pronunciation of the word “adult”.  My friend contended that it is pronounced uh-dult (like the ‘a’ sound in the word ‘another’), and I said it should be pronounced aah-dult (like the ‘a’ sound in the word ’stack’).  When I got back to my desk, I looked it up on Merriam-Webster online, and it turns out that both pronunciations are acceptable.  Here, check it out for yourself if you don’t believe me – “adult”.

That’s all for tonight’s post and educational lesson!  Have a good week, everyone!

It’s been a pretty painful week.  My weigh-in at Weight Watchers® last week was bad.  I’m too embarassed to even mention the amount, but suffice it to say, I gained.  This week has been much better than last so far, but still not that great.  Hopefully, there won’t be any more damage at this Wednesday’s weigh-in.

I also started up physical therapy again last week after a two-week layoff.  I know the weight gain had everything to do with my increase in pain, but, I also had the added soreness of doing the PT exercises once again.  Today, I had aquatic therapy, and that went pretty well.

So, if I just stay on track consistently, I think I can be successful in losing weight.  It’s just a matter of staying the course, which is simple in theory, but not easy in practice.  We all know that, of course.  That’s part of our life experience, I guess.

This week, I’m going to start walking a little bit each day, no matter how painful it is, even if it’s only for five minutes.  I also pledge to keep on track with my points counting.  I hope everyone has a great week!

I know I’ve blogged many times before about how one of the hardest things is making it through the weekend while sticking to plan.  Well, this past weekend, I didn’t make it through very well at all.  I ate pizza, I ate a hoagie, and I ate some greasy diner food.  I think my only weakness that I didn’t indulge in is take-out Chinese egg rolls, and believe me, I was very close to that one, too.

Then, today, Monday, no problems at all.  I kept within my WW points limit and didn’t feel tempted at all.  Go figure.  Since I’ve had a really nice weight loss recently, I hope the weekend doesn’t pack on too much.  If I hold even for this week, I’ll be satisfied at this point.  My weigh-in is on Wednesday, so wish me luck!

I made it to a Weight Watchers meeting today for the first time in three weeks.  I never was able to make it to any alternative meetings, so, consequently, today was my first weigh-in in three weeks.  Even though I haven’t made it to any meetings, I have managed to stay pretty well on plan, with the exception of Labor Day weekend.  Plus, I was sick almost all of last week, and didn’t have that much appetite.

So, my weight loss tally for the last three weeks is 11.8 pounds!!  Whoo-hoo!!  Also, I’m down a total of 24 pounds since I restarted my efforts in May and joined WW!!  So, I’m pretty pleased with that.  It’s nice when your efforts get rewarded by the scale.  I’m also having a little less pain when I walk, which is a good thing.  Overall, I’d say things are going pretty well.  Now, I just have to keep it going!